Jon's awesome. Frightening. We were walking home from SARS-stock last night and on the hill watching the thousands of pedestrians was a young couple holding a tiny baby. I go gushy over babies and jokingly said something along the lines of "Aww, Jon, I want a baby!". Instead of laughing at it or freaking out, he just said "Well, we'll see after you finish school and I have my career started.", and kept walking as if he hadn't made plans for at least 4 years into the future. So why aren't I freaking out? I am strangely calm after last weekend with him, and am pretty sure we're going to last the two months that he's away. It's strange, I can see myself with him in four years. With Josh, yes I loved him very much, but I just couldn't see a future with him. We were going in seperate directions and wouldn't have been happy with each other. But with Jon, although he's not Mr. Perfect, he may be Mr. Right. I personally will not be making plans for the next 4 years, but the idea didn't frighten me, it enamoured me. Who knows...

Not having a very good day... Parents are out of town, they'd asked me to take out the garbage and recycling this morning. So I'm in the shower at 7:45am and I hear the recycling truck go by! Why on earth would they ask ME if they know I'm going to be in the shower?! So I go dashing out of the shower in the hopes of at least getting the garbage out. I go hunting in the garage, the garbage has disappeared. Search in vain. Head back towards house, dripping wet in a towel, half-asleep and absolutely befuddled. Lo and behold, there's the garbage AND recycling out on the curb, the neighbours must have put it out. Tie my hair back in a ponytail, which looks funky since my hair is so short now and head downstairs. Heat up a muffin. What could go wrong? There is jam in the centre of the muffin and as I open it, boiling hot (literally) jam falls on my hand. So now I have horrible hair today PLUS burns on my fingers. Not that I can feel them because the office is like minus 2394802384 degrees and there is absolutely nothing to do... Just called Jon at worked and whined to him for a while. And as if things could not get any better, I'm heading to my grandmothers for lunch.... Grrreat. Blargh.

It is the end of July and this office is experiencing sub-arctic conditions... Brr! Another Monday slumped in my chair half-asleep and recovering from the weekend. Jon came over on Friday and picked me up, we headed to Collingwood for the weekend. We stopped in at a pub for dinner and drinks and got to his place around 11pm. The house is gorgeous, absolute mansion. And perhaps someone apart from me will be excited about this, he lives around the corner from Very Roger. Remember the guy who also used to be on the New VR between shows and then he got his own little show? He was also once a Sunshine Boy. He has long hair... Can someone please reassure me that I'm not a geek to be very excited about this? Jon has promised me that I can meet Very Roger, as I am quite surely his last remaining fan. Jon cooked me breakfast on Saturday and due to the rainy weather we watched movies before heading out to Elvis-Fest in town. Never seen so many fake sideburns in such a small area! We also went to Blue Mountain Village for Starbucks and shopping. His cousin Isaiah lives in Owen Sound so we went there for dinner with Isaiah's girlfriend Tori. Their friends, another couple, came over as well. Nice people, had a good time, but definately feeling very young. We went to The Harb, the largest bar in town, which really isn't say much. Drank a fair amount and Isaiah was toasted, so had some interesting conversations with him ("You're so gorgeous! I mean, you're just so gorgeous!") Went a tad kooky depressive when we got home, which turned out to be a great thing because I got to talk over the relationship with Jon. Things honestly could not be better right now. We slept in really late on Sunday and he cooked me breakfast and we headed out with Tori and Isaiah to Sauble Beach. That would have been charming had it not had a brisk breeze, making it to chilly for myself to enter the water. So Jon and I went shopping :) I'm so impressed with him, he bought me a shirt last week that's not only my size but my style as well, and it looks great! Super boyfriend. Got into my place late at night (he had to go totally out of his way to drop me off) and went hysterical at the horrible pics taken of him at my birthday. The first one makes his look like he's on crack and has horrible jaundice. The second one he looks like a depressed down syndrome child. And the third he looks like a mutated turtle who has hyper-extended their neck. And these are the only pictures that I have of him. Really, an excellent weekend. Next up for the two of us is the Stones concert on Wednesday. Boyfriend is superb, so happy.

I would like to document my strange dream last night. I was one of the two finalists for The Bachelor but it was such a surprising shock that I'd made it that far, so I hadn't packed a fancy dress to wear when Andrew Firestone proposed to me. I was panicking and trying on all of these unappropriate clothes while trying to put together something half decent. If this wasn't bizarre enough, the members of Sloan and a midget were running around naked. Interpretation anyone?

.MODEROB.

Hey Chris...
Peace and camel fleece!

At my work on the bulletin board facing my desk, there is the picture of a small boy. Who is this small boy you may be wondering? Beats the hell outta me! It's a Sears portrait style picture of a boy about 3 or 4 years old, with an evil smile and wearing infant's clothing. This boy scares me. He stares at me all day long. This would not be so mysterious if he were, say, the child of one of the women at work or even the child of a client. But no! No one knows who he is! Evil mystery child continues to haunt me.

Argh.... Getting annoyed.... Carol doesn't seem to appreciate the fact that Jon is leaving in two months, so he is my priority right now... And getting all this stuff organized for the move... Argh. BUT, in excellent news, it's Elvis Fest up in Collingwood this weekend, ya'll know my obsession! I want to have sex with an Elvis impersonator, that's my goal in life. I better get off work early today, I haven't even started packing yet, or doing my nails for that matter. My boyfriend is delicious. I just wish I wasn't quite so screwed up. I've got a great thing going for me right now, Jon is amazing and really cares about me. The two months though scares the hell out of me. He wouldn't cheat on me, I know that, but I'm not sure if I could go without cheating on him. Long distance is not my forte, hell, commitment isn't my forte. Josh and I couldn't do long distance and this distance is going to be even bigger. It's not the type of thing where I can pick up the phone and call him, if I need to talk to him I'd need to wait until he gets a hold of me. And even after he gets back, who knows how often he'll be up in Ottawa. He plans to be there a lot, but what if things change while he's in Europe? What if he changes, what if I change? What if I meet someone else? What if he does? I think my problem is that I have a hard time trusting the strength of our relationship. And it's not him I'm worried about, it's me.

Ow ow ow my stomach hurts. Humph. Alright... Pepsi, Coke, either one in diet, either one caffeine free, fountain drinks or even lemon flavored, IT ALL TASTES THE SAME TO ME!!! It's all coke, it's all the same. That's all I have on the subject. Was in a lousy mood yesterday cuz a lady pissed me off on the phone at work. Y'all know I don't get angry easily but every now and then I fall apart... Grr... She put me in a foul mood for the rest of the day, even the cute courrier who told me he'd drop by everytime he's in the neighbourhood to see me (hehe) did not cheer me up (well, just a wee bit). I went over to Jon's after playing on the computer to unwind and he cooked me another amazing meal (love him!). We headed off to Ikea around 8. 400$ later... Oy! I got my desk, which I went there for but then I got other such essentials as an illuminated flower lamp and salad tongs... Poor, poor Jon. Especially now that my desk is stuck in the backseat and the trunk of his car since it wouldn't fit in mine. I tried to convince him to cover it in a blanket or something so that no one will try to steal it. He laughed at me. Made out at his place for a while, he looked hot, and then came home. Not sure what's up for the weekend, it was supposed to be the Gonq but the rainy weather on Saturday has made us reconsider to maybe go to his chalet in Collingwood, which is supposed to be the nicest of the houses. Collingwood is more my speed. Alright now my stomach hurts and there is something in my eyeball. I'm quitting while I'm ahead.

When you love someone, let them go.
If they come back, they're yours forever.
If they don't, call them up drunk the next night.

Hahahhahahaha!

Happiness is all the rage.

The usual Monday afternoon weekend recap...

Got the hair chopped off after work and headed to Jon's. I'd told him to expect me at around 7:30, since I figured the appointment was at 5:30, should take an hour long, plus an hour drive. As we all know, scheduling is not my strong point. I was done by 6 and at his place before 6:30. And with my luck, he was on the golf course so I couldn't get a hold of him. No one was home at his house, I didn't want to hang out with his father anyways, so I went to TD bank and did my nails in the parking lot. I wandered off to find a Shoppers and a Mc Donald's, which is my favorite way to pass time. Not surprisingly, I got lost and Jon had to direct me back to his place... I should never explore new territory without a guide! We went to the Reservoir Lounge which was fantastic. It was a mature crowd but the food was amazing and so were the martinis (strawberry coconut martini is HIGHLY recommended). The band came on around 10pm and we stayed past midnight. Incredibly romantic and we got our laughs at some of the people on the dance floor (c'mon now, it's jazz music and this one chick was skipping and line dancing). We checked in our hotel for the night and woke up fairly early and wandered off to Kensington Market and Chinatown. Jon was exuberant over his vintage shirts and I took him to the Jamaican grocery stores. Gorgeous weather, gorgeous boy, gorgeous time. We checked out of the hotel and went back to his place to pass out. He cooked me a Pad Thai for dinner and we went to a local bar to meet up with some of his friends. Very laid-back, tons of cougars and old men so I had my fun. I left Sunday morning after he cooked me breakfast, as he had a golf tournament in the afternoon.

Another amazing weekend... *Smile* Next weekend it looks like the Gonq again, but just partying there this time and Mel and her boyfriend will be coming with us. The long weekend, we may hit up Montreal or Ottawa, and the weekend after that we're moving my stuff up to Ottawa and partying there for the weekend with my friends. One weekend in August will be at his Collingwood place, and then he's off to Europe while I head back up to Ottawa. Scary! The framework for the rest of the summer has been laid down. Time flies when your boyfriend has dimples... Haha!

Can I brag about my boyfriend for a minute? He's just so... lovely. :) I went over to his place last night for yet another Jon-cooked dinner and to meet his parents. All went fairly well, I'd say so at least. Lay in bed and chatted until I left and went to Carol's to meet her and Kelly. We went to the Rose & Crown on Eglinton (close to JJ's) for a drink with Sully and Derek (I love those boys!). They were all excited to be heading down to Houston for the weekend. And, I KNOW y'all are jealous, I got to feel Sully's newly hair-free legs. Ooh la la! Went back to Carol's and passed out, left there this morning and headed to work. Oh and my car broke down yesterday, sucked testicles. Daddy got it fixed for me though and I got to drive his car, so it all worked out...

Weekend plans with the amazing boyfriend...
Friday night we have reservations for the Reservoir Lounge for fancy dinner. I've never been there before but they're supposed to have amazing live jazz, blues and swing music and some great people on the dance floor. The reviews I've read promise the most perfect and romantic date ever. We also decided to liven things up, and we got a suite in a hotel close to the Lounge for the evening. So sweet :) Saturday morning I'm introducing him to Kensington Market, which is my favorite place in Toronto and we're going back to his place. Plans for Saturday are Revival, which plays 80's brit-pop and rock. The atmosphere is supposed to be amazing and anywhere that plays Blur is tops. Back to his place to "do crossword puzzles" for the rest of the weekend. Hehe! Have to enjoy the boy while he's in the country!

Blogging at work, this is getting to be a bad habit! Kelly picked me up shortly after I got off of work and after getting hideously lost (that is NOT a bridge and it is impossible to turn left when the directions read to stay in the right hand lane!), we picked up Carol. Headed to Sears and picked up our paint (light yellow and light green), which took forever and then to Ikea to pick up some basics and start the shopping lists. This is going to get expensive! We went to Eastside's for dinner and my adorable boyfriend met us there, to watch us eat for an hour in the opposite end of Toronto from where he lives. I like him :) The bartender wanted to slaughter us, our theory was that he was recently dumped by an Asian girl. It was worrisome when he was standing on the bar, as to get a clearer shot at Kelly. On our way home, Kelly and I decided that perhaps it would have been nice to leave him an encouraging note. Ideas included "I'm sorry no one cares about you enough to remove the two by four from your ass" and "I'm sure you have a bright smile. Perhaps you should smile more instead of shooting malicious glares.". Plans for tonight are the amazing meet-the-parents at Jon's place and dinner there, followed by a bar in Toronto with Sully and my beloved Derek. Can I mention how dead-ass sexy Sully looked on the infomercial for the hair buffer? Does that work on areas other than the legs?

hope is just a phase.

so, word on the street, or should i say rumor has it... i heard you love me.

I survived Algonquin. I feel like a deserve of those tacky tourist shirts. I like how none of you warn me that a portage is not a type of boat, but the physical action of carrying a boat. I suprisingly had a great time. We left my place on Friday at about seven and didn't get to the cottage until midnight. That's including the boat ride in the pouring rain in the pitch black night. The place is gorgeous. It's not the tacky and rustic shack I was expecting. It's a double beach front property with a boat house with sleeping quarters upstairs, a modern guest log cabin for four with a shower and washroom, and then the main cabin with peaked ceilings and skylights and sleeping quarters. Lovely! I was impressed. Saturday morning the weather stil wasn't great so after Jon cooked me breakfast (bacon and eggs) we took the boat back to the car and headed out to the Algonquin museum. We got about two feet away from a bull moose on the way there, it was great. We stopped by some of his friends cottages by boat on the way back. When we got back he made me lunch (quesadillas with presciutto (sp?) and shiitake mushrooms). I fell asleep for a while, and when I woke up he was in the kitchen with his friend Graham cooking golden curry chicken. After dinner some more of his freinds came over. Anthony is the son of one of the co-founders of Roots and is going studying film at NYU and he came with his girlfriend Katya who goes to McGill and his cousin Domenic. They brought Rebecca, who's in law school at Osgoode. We sat out in the sun room and drank and smoked, good times. Jon talks in accents when he drinks and Graham was being hysterical, so it was fun. Can I mention how all of his friends have that hot outdoorsy lumberjacking hiker look? Yum. They're so scruffy but gorgeous, every single one. Sunday morning we slept in and again, he cooked me breakfast and then we went fishing. I caught one that was like 2 inches, just a bit larger than the lure. Details, details! We went to an island too see the rapids and then did some bushwacking. THAT, was not fun. Hot, sweaty, covered in mosquitoes. I was getting cranky and he thought that I was having the time of my life. Just keep smiling! We packed up and left around 6pm and got home around 10:30pm after getting stuck in traffic.

Anyways, that was just the details. No, it was not as bad as I thought it was going to be. I will not be moving to Algonquin anytime soon and much prefer a resort. Good experience though, and Jon took good care of me. He seemed to find my blundering about in the wilderness absolutely adorable. Go figure. Especially as had forgotten every single item of makeup that I own at home and had the au naturel look. Poor boy must be delusional. I don't like him talking about leaving in August, I try not to think about it. We'll see. He sees this lasting for a long time and already has plans for as far as December for us. See, for those of you who know me, normally I'd be freaking out at this point. I dumped Josh the first time he told me that he loved me. This is different somehow. I just see him going so far in life. He's extremely intelligent and it's not just that he has plain old ambition, he has the education and the skills to get there, he's already pretty far on his way. He put up with me for a weekend up North and I think that alone speaks volumes about him. He's good to me... for me... I've never had an argument with him and since I don't see him that much we just enjoy every single second that we have together. We're just having fun every single day.

Had a lovely evening with Jon... We had all of these plans but after we had dinner we just made out for the whole night. Sorry, I needed that after last weekend! I'm heading up to The Gonq with him tomorrow. (Yes, I named it that myself. Could you tell?) This good be the end of a perfectly fine relationship. There is no road to his house. Who doesn't have a road? Do I LOOK like a bushman to you? He told me to pack my raingear. Raingear? By raingear do you mean my designer umbrella? So I went to the LCBO and bought a ton of beer, I figure you can't feel the mosquitoes if you're trashed. You also should not operate a boat if you're trashed, hmm... By the way, y'know how people go portaging? What the bejeez is a portage? I tried to warn him... I excel only at indoor sports. Wish me luck.

I wrote the story myself. It's all about a girl who lost her reputation but never missed it.

I told the new me:
"Meet me at the bus station and hold a sign that reads: 'Today is the first day of the rest of your life'"

But the old me met me with a sign that read:
'Welcome back'

Here was my night. After watching the new Big Brother (but of course!), Jon called and we were chatting it up. Well he was chatting and I was dozing, but don't tell him that. Anyhoo, it was about midnight when I started shrieking because there was a spider on the top of the wall at the head of my bed. Not just any spider, an EVIL spider. I promptly move my bed to the opposite side of the room and go and get the Raid. As I explain to Jon, no, I cannot just squish it because it involves my hand in proximity to it's evilness. So I'm like 10ft. form the spider and I start dousing it. It falls, I scream. Jon laughs. Hard. It's like running on the floor and I'm standing on my bed in the far corner trying not to awaken my parents. Or make Jon laugh anymore at my expense. So I slept in the far corner, suffocating with my face buried in the pillow and sweating under numerous blankets since I did not want the spider to get revenge on me in my sleep or to crawl into my mouth. Ugh!

I had the scariest dream yesterday. My house was a mansion and I was there late at night with my mother and Carol. Jon called and said that he was coming over. When the car pulled up and he started to get out of the car, I could tell it wasn't him because of the shoes that he was wearing. I could tell it was Rob, the "ballroom dancer" that I met on the weekend. My cell phone rang, and sure enough, it was Rob. I was getting freaked out because I had never given him that number. He admitted that he was outside and couldn't understand why I found that creepy or scary, he was just being spontaneous. Since I had never given him my address, I was understandly angry and told him to leave. I then got in my car and drove around a bit to try to clear my head, but I was shaking. I wasn't in any state to drive so I went home. Carol and my mother were in the living room and my mother was tring to make a call. There was no dial tone. I was trying to fix the phone when I could hear someone breathing on the other end, it was Rob. He was explaining how he wants to see me and how much he cares for me. I flipped out on him and when my mother could see how upset I was, she got an idea of the situation and got me to call the police. That's about when I woke up, when the 911 operator answered the phone.

So what does this mean? Kelly and Jordan's opinion that Rob is creepy may be true? Overactive imagination? Second time I've dreamed about Rob since I met him on Saturday. Hmmm.... Creeped me out though, I was acting strange all night after that.

Had a nice long talk with Jon last night, things are going great. Looking forward to seeing him. This is sad, I don't like going a week without him.

(Continued...)
Leslee starts feeling sick. We figure out that the waiter poisoned her club sandwich the day before. We proceed to get gruesome details of her illness for the endurance of the trip. Disgusting yet hysterical. After the usual afternoon nap, we head to 311, the unofficial TKE house. Jordan, Derek and Newf (Mark) are there, as well as Islatin the Bosnian (Zack). Zack's adorable and tries Jell-O for the first time. As he puts it, "All guys like things that are jiggly." Other great ones were "Where I come from, vodka is like water." A little into himself. Cute but mute. We head out to Vibe and meet Espo, Liran, Jake and April there. Great bar, my sort of place. Lounge downstairs with house music and upstairs is a dance floor with hiphop. Meet Rob. Ex-president of Acacia, recently signed to a record label, and a professional dancer. He supplies me with alcohol for the night and teaches me how to salsa, merengue and the likes. Borderline sketchy but absolutely amazing to dance with. He got really serious with me really fast (as Kelly puts it, none of the guys I meet have a fear of commitment). Nice guy though, I'll call him next time I'm up in Ottawa. Carol hooks up with Rob's bodyguard, Rene, who's drop dead sexy. Absolutely gorgeous. Liran gets himself in shit with the bartender. Leslee hooks up with Newf. We head to Dunn's Diner for some 4am breakfast and I don't know what it was but Mark and I were laughing so hard at Leslee that we were crying. The whole diner was listening to and talking to us. The waiter was old and flaming and gave his number to Kelly at the end of the night. As we walk back to 311 I freak out about being in a relationship and go hysterical again. We head back to our place and gossip. Girl talk about the weekend.
Sunday:
Jason comes over in the morning. Chris comes over with McD's for us. I love Chris. They laugh at us and Leslee who talks about her psychopathic tendencies (Bup!) End up laughing so hard that we're crying again. We take the typical afternoon nap and Leslee goes to see Mark for a bit. Liran calls to apologize for the previous night. We pack up and head out around 5. We get stuck in bumper to bumper traffic around Oshawa. Ridiculous. We're all tired and cranky so we do what we do best, check out guys. The Angry One was my favorite. More girl talk. Get home about 10pm.

Great weekend! Yes, I missed Jon, but I survived. Yes, the guys up in Ottawa are awesome. Yes, I freaked out. We'll see how this goes! Jon's coming over on Wednesday because I can't wait until the weekend to see him :)

Adventures in Ottawa... Headed up with Carol, Leslee and Kelly after work on Thursday night. Here are some highlights:
Thursday:
Leave Newmarket at 10pm. Yes, late night driving. Check out guys in surrounding cars for four and a half hours. Create plots for people driving around us. As Leslie puts it, "It's like driving in... the ozone layer." (She meant the twilight zone, close enough.) Freaky drive, cars trying to run us off the road, truck drivers rescuing us, turkey dances in Kingston and the ghost radio station. We arrive in Ottawa about 3am and set up camp at Kelly's.
Friday:
Kelly's apartment doesn't have air conditioning. Boiling and roasting hot. Carol and I sign out lease and we head to the market. Leslee picks up a waiter. Afternoon nap. Leslee starts to feel ill. Joey calls. I melt. Friday night we drink and head to On Tap with Jason and Mel, it's beyond dead so we're all cranky. Enter group of cute guys. hooper is cute but has the trucker look and long hair. Derek is tame looking but cute and nice. Mark is dead sexy and has been sleeping with our waitress. Dave looks like Bon Jovi and is hysterical. Enter Carol. She proceeds to take one of them to the bar, to the bank machine and back to the bar. This guy, Frank, buys drinks for all of us, including the guys. Liran shows up with Stian, who Kelly's interested in. Sal shows up to see me and Kristen comes too. Good Nick and Kay show up. I hit it off with one in the group of cute guys, Derek, and toss myself into his lap for the evening. Many many shots. He buys me a ridiculous amount of alcohol which I supply to the girls and Liran. I get fairly intoxicated and decide to leave with the group of cute boys and Carol when the bar closes. We head to the park. Carol's making out with Bon Jovi in the grass and gets attacked by mosquitoes. I wander off with Derek and try my best to behave myself. Smoke up with them. Mustang comes screeching in. Lo and behold, Bad Nick. He argues with Carol and I for a while and rages off. Invitation to the cottage with them for the next night. Leslee makes out with Liran. Kelly makes out with Stian. Give Derek my number. Carol gives Bon Jovi my number. Way to go Carol! Leslee and I get caught in a hurricane outside. Torrential downpour. I get the good idea to stand under a tall metal gas station for shelter.
Saturday:
Head to the TKE Beirut Tournament. Get to see all of the boys which was great, especially as they were all drunk and topless. No complaints!

I wanna go home... I wanna go home... Y'know when you get one of those really hokey songs in your head for no reason at all? For the past half hour I've been humming the one "Sometimes when we touch, the honesty's too much... I have to close my eyes and blahblahblah..." Somebody help me! I'm at work right now. I love bread. Bread and I had an amazing time yet again on Tuesday. I drove down to his place in the morning and went out for lunch with his aunt, grandmother and great-uncle. It was nice, a lot better than I thought it would be. Strange I've met all of them before his actual parents. On an impulse, we ended up at the zoo for the afternoon. I haven't been there in donkey's years (pun intended) and things got ridiculous when I drenched him with water in front of the otter tank. Suprisingly enough, he did not thank me for the refreshment and I have bruises all over my arm from him pinching me! No respect! Haha! We went back to his place for dinner and Kelly came over. We went to Souz Dal, a funky little martini lounge and you can only imagine the fun once Jon convinced Kelly that the window was tinted and that the pedestrians could not see her. We went out for some gelato and then spent some time in the car trying to get out of traffic. I just never have a bad time when I'm with him. I'm heading up to Ottawa when I get off of work tonight. Call my cell at (613) 720-7200 if you want Kelly, Carol or I. It's going to be a LONG night, I'm exhausted and we're not leaving here until 10pm. Not to mention the fact that we're stopping in Kingston (about halfway) to go to the bar there. Oh dear! Should be a good weekend, I think Carol is happy to have dragged me away from Jon. I will NOT be calling Joey this weekend, due to the Matt Damon-esque situation. (It makes sense to me!) I do not WANT to be tempted, hence I shall avoid temptation. The weekend after that I'm going to Algonquin with Jon. Maybe he is unaware that I am not the outdoorsy type. I bought a fuschia halter dress for the occasion today. I repeat, I am not the outdoorsy type! Wish me luck this weekend, most bets that are going on right now say that I will cheat on Jon this weekend.